everything and nothing

just stop holding your tongue

I’ve kept a blog of one kind or another for…oh, gosh, more than a third of my life at this point. I’ve kept a handwritten journal longer (partially because blogs weren’t really a thing until I was in my teens, and then I didn’t get the internet at home until I was about twenty), and IΒ find that these days I rely more on my handwritten journal than I do on blogging of any kind.

There was a point in my life where the opposite was true, when I felt…not like I had to share everything with the world, or that I had anything particularly worth sharing for that matter, but that I needed the validation that came with my words being seen and heard and sometimes responded to. I made friends through blogging sites, sharing our day-to-day thoughts, our struggles and triumphs, our dreams. I’m still friends with some of the people I connected with in those venues, and am grateful for both those friendships and the platforms that made them possible.

These days…I don’t know. I feel very much like I don’t have anything all that interesting to say, nothing unique or important or vital. If anyone else came to me and said these things about themselves, I would be the first to tell them that no! everyone has something unique to say! everyone has something important to share!

But for me? I don’t know. Is it that it’s not important, or that it’s too important? Is it that I don’t have anything to share, or just nothing that I want to share? I don’t know what flicked that switch back the other way. Am I just getting older? I’ve always been a very private person despite trying to share things, maybe that’s just gotten moreso as I’ve gotten older.

Anyway. Blogging about not knowing what to blog about – or whether or not I have anything to blog about at all – is absolutely the most boring thing to blog about, for sure. So that’s it for today!

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